Seasons

Hello my Dear Readers,

I’m flushed and sweaty– I’ve just got in from the Gym. My hands are extremely cold too..all year round issue, nothing new! I managed an hour body combat class, that’s if you’re interested to know. I felt like writing, before I soak myself in a well deserved salty bath. It has been a hard week, and it felt good to get the tension out and exceed my bodily limits. I am practising to feel the feels but also exert them in ways I feel the need.

I was reflecting on seasons and how many I’ve been through in the last years.

Seasons are wonderful too as they provide focus.

Many seasons I don’t wish to think of  because they trigger memories but I wouldn’t be here without them and I appreciate and acknowledge my life experiences.

Some of which you’ve witnessed in my previous Blog and Social Media. So there was my season in cooking/Baking, and learning & crafting that, not to forget getting better at making slightly healthier choices.

My season in Mothering and honing that and continuing to learndevelop, and grow as my children do too.

My never-ending season with fitness/weight-loss and documenting that. My aim today is to simply be ‘Mentally’ strong enough to endure the week..tbh!

Because physical movement really aids life.

And how these seasons fall so well and keep me there for some time powering through and other days completely overwhelmed and depleted ..until I’ve learnt somewhat well what I needed to know.

And how this season that I am in now, which started almost two years ago, is the season that made me wish my life away. Never have I cried nor pleaded so fully, and never have I felt every emotion possibly known to man all at once. However I’m here and working on it still. It is the best thing that I have ever or will ever possibly do for myself. I accept my emotions as they were, as they are and as they come. I am learning to validate them and I empower myself in this way. This particular season has taught me that my tolerance level is high and perhaps my previous seasons and my enduring them long enough to succeed was preparing me for this particular one.

What I am trying to say is, seasons serve purpose. They really do and they’re amazingly uncomfortable, but sickening(ly) worth it. So if ever you feel like giving up, remember this..this season shall pass so you will and can work through it.

Realising and coming to an awakening was and is still sometimes hard, especially if you were so fixed on false hope, reality or illusion. It is hard, but there is relief on the other side. That is what I keep telling myself anyway.

My Creator promises me this.

Much Love,

Ilham

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